2/25/2010

Woohooo

No more mentor observation for me..only 1 more supervisor observation to go..My AE is moving a bit slowly...ayeyayay..Atleast it's moving although at a snail pace..Currently I'm at my parents house..but this Saturday there's this football match happening at my school & Muhyiddin will be there.Next week,there will be NO learning in the classroom because it's Co-academic week!!--how great is that for the students??

During my time being in the school,there's no such thing like that.Next week I'll be auditioning my students for the class singing competition(Mon),we'll have crossword puzzle and spelling bee comps(Wed-Fri) too.I think the singing thing will definitely be a blast & the students can even bring their own guitar to school & perform in class.I'll definitely be ready with my camera.:)

Some of my male students are becoming more and more like monkeys nowadays..haha.Nevermind,I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt since this week has been hectic & tiring everyone--frm Mon-today there was sports comp(tarik tali,sprints,relay race & so forth) & marching practice.Plus next week is a no-learning week--thus the other week they have to buckle up--OR ELSE!!-_-

Tuesday will be the much awaited Sports Day and it'll be held at the huge Shah Alam Stadium..woohoo!!I'm in charge of the program book--thanks to Freaky(of Boonga Art Shoes) for helping me design it.He has helped me with my previous class PD seminar too..You're such a great friend!!Here's his WEBSITE!! --EDIT:Oops sorry,cos' I didn't get to use his design since the school has their own template..hehe

I just found out recently why every morning,in front of the school,there'll be MBSA ppl helping the traffic moving..turns out S'gor MB children goes to my school..yikes!I hope that his children is not in my class because it'll be nerve wrecking.

Haven't been sleeping much this week..Thus after this..it's zzzz time on my comfy bed..Actually I've much to blog about but I forgot about it..eheh..Oh,I finished reading Dear John by Nicholas Sparks last week & I've to say,although the ending was sad(spoiler,I know!),it taught me that sometimes loving someone does mean letting go.I was a bit peeved over the fact that Amanda Seyfried looks nothing like the Savannah that was mentioned in the book...But hopefully her acting chops will make up for it.

I can't wait for the much needed trip!!Plus,it'll happen after my last supervisor observation..woohoo!There's the 1 week school break that's happening in 2 more weeks..yes!!More holidays!!

I think I have a clear vision of what I want to do after I graduate.My mum suggested it to me & I should have thought of it sooner but I didn't want to do it while being a student,thus I think once I graduate,I'll DEFINITELY embark on it cos' I know I can do it!!:)

Anyway,what do you think about a 10 year old using vulgarities such as the word F&%$ & sial & many more on her fb shoutout?Everything is F*&^% this..or sial that..ish..Oh,this girl is an enemy of my little cousin & she is such a spoiled kid..like if you look at her FB account,you wouldn't believe that she's only 10 because she acts like she's 17 years old..aiyooo..

The worst thing is,her mother is on her fb friend list & she does nothing about it?tsk2..I didn't give a damn at first but after what the girl said to my cousin on her FB,I was like,'walahwei!Ur just a kid--so act like one--don't try to be rude,obnoxious & whatnot because u think it's cool'..Goodness!When I was 10,I was playing masak2 still.-_-

2/23/2010

Self respect/ramblings

It has been a long time since I have blogged about something that makes me emotionally charged to do so.This time it is about self respect and it boils down to how I feel women should have more self respect towards themselves in relation to what happened with the whole Tiger Woods and his I-lost-count-how-many-girls-he-slept-with piece of news.

I am just utterly appalled and sick to the stomach when I see how the girls that slept with Tiger Woods while he was somebody’s else’s husband are now achieving their 15 minutes of fame.One of them are working for Extra(like WTF?) and another had a spread in Maxim. It makes me,1.Judge the credibility of these magazines and entertainment channel when they use those girls to up their ratings and 2.How pathetic these girls are for using the ‘Omg,I like,totally slept with Tiger Woods!’ as their claim to fame.GOOD GOD!Have some self respect please!

I know Tiger is to be blamed for sleeping with those girls but still, seeing them milking their short lived fame for what it’s worth is just wrong! It makes me wonder what kind of world we live in now whereby people are celebrating people who sleep with a husband/father.The thing that urged me to post this whole thing was when I heard one of the girls commenting that Tiger’s recent public apology as a joke.What the f*&^?

Yeah,it was a little too late(it’s been 2 months!) BUT one should not open one’s mouth when one is the one who has slept with someone else’s husband/father.Like hello??You’re not a saint either as he didn’t rape you and you slept with him willingly so why the heck are you giving so much flack about it?I don’t see you apologizing to Erin are you?Sigh.

Okay,the reason why I am so hell bent over the issue of a cheating spouse and his many mistress is because it has happened to my own family a long time ago and it happened not just once. But of course it wasn’t as sordid as what happened to Erin but still it affected me, a lot.I have serious trust issues and whenever I feel or see that a guy is a bit shady and has many girls around him,I tend to not want something more than just being mere friends. Yeah,my family is okay now, but it used to be HELL back then.Thus I am sort of glad that Erin’s children are little for they won’t be able to understand what is happening at the moment.

Tiger cheated because he CAN(as in he's rich & famous & girls throw themselves at him & instead of turning the other cheek,he went straight to the meat!)---because of course the girls who slept with him will brag to their friends that hey,I like totally slept with Tiger Woods,the one who has too much money that he doesn’t know what to spend it on.It wasn’t like he had to beg them to sleep with him.It takes two to tango.As much as he should be blamed, those girls shouldn’t be left unscathed either.

But I’ve no idea if they’ll divorce or not because as what I’ve experienced being the children in the middle of it all,when marriage and children is involve,it is harder to leave because you can’t just think about yourself.It’s a different matter if you’re just a couple and then you can just get up and leave. Maybe they’ll try to make it work,if she loves him that much to forgive him,we’ll never know.

Oh,marriage is different than being in a relationship because you are bonded legally/religiously and if you’re a Muslim,you’ll know that divorce is one of the things that should be avoided if possible.BUT if you have a cheating boyfriend who has cheated on you many times,LEAVE him.SCRAM and just let him rot!

Sorry to those who might be affected by this post.But to me,cheating is not the answer.If you don’t want to be with someone,then end it.And I don’t condone the ‘open relationship’ thing.Meaning you and I can date other people.Like wtf?If you truly want to be someone,just be with them.Don’t call it a relationship if it isn’t.It’s a different matter if you date a couple of people when you’re not someone’s boyfriend/girlfriend(I’ve done that & I was single so it’s not like I belong to anyone)because to me that’s allowed.

But being in a relationship where you can date other people?That’s an OXYMORON!If you don’t want to be in a relationship,don’t be in one.Easy as that!I for one have given up on this whole 4 letter word thing because I don’t believe the one is out there for me.Maybe he has gone to Mars.:)

****Oh,just read it in the paper today--Cheryl Cole texted this to her philandering husband,Ashley Cole who cheated on her with 5 women--"Move out.It's over"...Simple&sweet.:)

2/19/2010

Week of leisure/laziness in pictures—a long post before I abandon this blog for a few days

*I love eating these!!There are so many fun flavors--even pink grapefruit!


Below are some of the things that I cooked and baked in these past few days.

*The bloomin’ onion was inspired by what Bobby Flay did for the Onion Battle in Iron Chef America.I think he made it waaay better than I could..sigh.I’ll try it again maybe sometime this week.I envisioned it to be far crispier than it turned out.



*The rice krispies treats is because I’ve been meaning to make them for a long time but didn’t get to it.I remembered eating them almost everyday back when I was 12 years old because they were sold in packets and everytime I finished my tuition at Cikgu Adam’s house along with other SKS9 kids & Sri Muda kids,we’d eat the krispies treats outside of his house.Good times!

*I’ve been making lasagna since I was 15 years old.I bake it this week because my brother who turned 20 last Friday(12th February) requested for it.His girlfriend gave him a gift & a box of cupcakes—T_T..when will I ever get to celebrate my birthday with a boyfriend?

*I baked pineapple tarts for my parents who absolutely loves them & they can finish 50 pieces of them in 2 days!yikes!!hehe.

American Idol 9---yahoooo!!I love Didi because she sang Terrified(sang originally by Katherine McPhee feat.Jason Reeves & written by Kara) soooWELL!When she sang it,I was like, “where have I listened to that song before?” & I googled it & realize that I HAVE THE SONG ALL ALONG in my laptop.Because I like Jason Reeves when a friend asked me to listen to Droplets which was sung by him & Colbie Caillat. Now I can’t stop listening to Terrified although I wish I have Didi’s version to listen to.Simon said that she sang it way better than the original which was so true!

The other contestants that I’m excited to see performing next week is John Park and that 16 year old boy(I forgot his name) who sang Angel during the last part of Hollywood week because he gave me goosebumps although he forgot his lyrics at first.

Went to Ikea with my mum & 2 younger brothers recently (my other younger brother was off dating with his gf..sigh) and I so want a chaise lounge like the one below for my room...I keep imagining myself reading a book on it while it’s raining outside,with a steaming mug of green tea...ahhh...blissful!

Mama said that she’ll makeover my room soon..yeah!!I want a new wardrobe,more bookcase,a prettier chair for my vanity and a proper table for all my electronic equipment & tv..:)


I bought a vanilla candle there & it made my room smells so lovely.Bought some stuffs for baking too..hehe.Went to Sunway afterwards for lunch & thank God I managed to swerve them to NOT go to OU because I detest OU!!Sorry to OU lovers but I can safely say that in my almost 5 years of being a degree student,I’ve never set foot on OU—maybe once but I can’t remember.

I realized that I tend to buy too many fashion mags.haha.I just bought the March issue of Instyle(pic above) and Neil Patrick Harris is in the On My Mind column..I adore him because duh,I love How I Met Your Mother!Haven’t finished watching/downloading season 5 yet though cos’ I’ve been so busy.Btw,NARS named an eyeshadow after Kuala Lumpur & Zoe Kravitz wore it in the magazine—COOL!

Oh,I wonder why in the February issue of Instyle,they didn’t have the wedding column anymore??Usually for the February issue,every YEAR since I’ve been buying it in 2003,they’ll have a section for recent celeb weddings.But this year,there’s NONE!Maybe it’s because of the new editor?And the March issue cost rm21.90 instead of the usual rm17.90.I checked in other bookstores,the price is rm21.90 now for the March issue,but the February issue is still rm17.90.Is it because it’s much thicker?But still...But since I have been a long time fan,I didn’t really mind.

If you see from the picture above,I bought 2 local fashion magazines.The GLAM one I bought because I think the cover of Rozita Che Wan is genius!She looked edgy and strong,compared to her usual look & the yellow+black eyeshadow looked great on her!And I think the makeup artist for GLAM copied that black+yellow eyeshadow look from NYLON’S September 2009 issue—yes I have a very strong memory when it comes to beauty & fashion.:P

I bought the In Trend mag because there’s 2 couples that I adore were featured in this Q&A session for Valentine’s & it’s fun to read how well their guys know them!
Both NYLON and Vogue mags are back issues—thank God for magazine stores that sell back issue because there’s no NYLON mag being sold in Shah Alam.Thus,when I get too busy,I don’t get to buy the current issues.

The Vogue mag featured blogger Jane Aldridge of Sea of shoes(which I’ve linked for quite sometime in this blog) with her mom & they tried different looks which was so cool!I love her blog because she wears amazingly outrageous & beautiful stuff.

Oh,I just finished watching the entire season 4 of Ghost Whisperer (SPOILER ALERT!!) and I cried so many effing times during some of the episodes. WHY WHY did such thing have to happen to Jim??Why they had to make the storyline twist like that?TOO COMPLICATED!But as usual I adore Melinda’s clothes because she wears a lot of dresses since Jennifer Love Hewitt has a big booty—yeay!hahaha.Plus,I’m trying to recreate her makeup looks because she always wears this deep bronze or gold or brown creamy eyeshadow in the episodes & it looks gorgeous!

The picture below is to show you how tiny baby fingers are compared to mine!:)


And here are some of my current favourite things:


1)Studded cardigan&studded bag
The last time I had a studded bag was back when I was in Part 1 degree or was it Pre-TESl & the studs were similar to these one below. The bucket bag is in a lovely shade of grey & I’ve been wearing them ever since I bought em’ last Saturday.I just love the cardigan—it’s comfy but looked edgy because of the gold studs.

2)Bling2 bracelet in purple—the bracelet was actually discovered by my mum & I’d never thought of buying them.But she did and I’m glad because they look amazing on my wrist—eheh.

3)A bunch of earrings(okay,20 pairs)
I went earring crazy & bought 20 pairs at this place that sells it for cheap—rm 1 per pair--CRAZY!I won’t tell you where the place is because a girl can’t reveal all of her secrets.hehe.BUT you have to buy 20 pairs in order to get to buy em’ at rm1 per pair though. It was a great deal because I lpve earrings & because I ALWAYS loose one half of a pair,I though why not stock up?My mum paid for it because I’m always broke!

4)Maybelline Magnum Volum’ Express mascara & Banana Boat Sunwear FACES
Maybelline makes the best mascara & in the States,a Maybelline Great Lash mascara(not available in Malaysia) is sold every 1.2 SECONDS!For real!Thus,I decided to try their new mascara—I’ve a secret—I try everyone of their mascara when it comes out,as in BUY them.This new baby is great!It doesn’t clumps & makes your lashes look really full and isn’t heavy which is a plus & you don’t feel like you’re wearing any mascara.

The sunblock has been recommended by Instyle magazine for years & I only bought it a few weeks ago because I my arms & feet are getting darker & it doesn’t match my face anymore.hahah.It’s because at the school that I’m doing my practicum,we have sports practice a few days in a week since the sports day is getting nearer.The sunblock smells like coconut & doesn’t feel sticky even if you put lots on which is a great plus!

Okay I have to get back to real life.Next week will be the last time my mentor will observe me and my supervisor will be coming on the same day too..yikes!Plus I haven’t really keep my thesis moving..oops..:)Hope you have a great week people!

2/18/2010

HAIR!


This post will be strictly about haircare because someone asked me how come my hair never looks out of place. Even a guy friend said that it amazes him that my bangs/fringe managed to stay in place all day(man are clueless sometimes..haha).The secret is easy(I’ll explain it after this) and this is the truth—I don’t use ANY product on my hair—no serum or gel ever since I found the right stuffs for my hair, about 1 year ago.

**I’ve been blow drying my own hair since I was —12 YEARS OLD.NO JOKE!!hehehe.Thus,if my friends are puzzled why my hairstyle haven’t changed much ever since I entered uni,it’s because back in my teen years,I’ve tried EVERY hairstyle imaginable.When I was 12,I’ll style my hair differently every day!SERIOUSLY!I’ve cut my hair really short & yes,I used to cut my own hair(NOT ANYMORE!) back in my teen years.

I had my hair really really long & one length at one point---ughh..it looked horrible!I have horrible pictures as proof which are kept in a vault at home,away from the public eye because it’s embarrassing.Though some of my friends have seen me with short hair when they saw old Raya pics on the walls of my house..sigh..NEVER AGAIN!

ANYWAY,here are the things you should have in order to make your hair become well behave throughout the day/week.

1.A great haircut—and this doesn’t have to be expensive.

2.A great shampoo & conditioner & deep conditioning mask---these need not be expensive either!

3.A great blowdryer/hairdryer—now this one need a bit more of cash.You can get a great one right below rm100.

1.A great haircut
Throughout my uni life,until about 1 year ago,I always go to this one particular salon because its near to my faculty,accessible and my friends go there as well.But they never seem to cut my fringe/bangs right.It almost NEVER stays in place a day after and I always end up touching my bangs & fixing it which made my friends make fun of me.

Suddenly, right after out of the blue,I wanted to follow my mother to this one hair salon that she has been going to for years and even back when she was with the law firm. I wanted to cut my hair there with her.I let Uncle Terry,my mum’s trusty hairstylist to cut my hair and I was AMAZED.

Turns out Uncle Terry has been gone for about 2 years because he opened a salon in Sydney and came back once in a while to check up on his business and family members. Thus,I only went there when he gets back.But NOW,he is staying here PERMANENTLY...yahoo!Which means—no more bad hair cuts!

Uncle Terry salon is the Redz Salon at PKNS Shah Alam.Yeah,who would have thunk that a great hairstylist lies there?I guess because his salon has been there for a loooong time,people doesn’t notice it anymore.He charges his clients moderately.It’s not expensive at all.I usually go there for a trim which cost me rm20 or to trim my bangs which cost me rm5.So people,go to Redz Salon and request for Uncle Terry!He manage to cut my bangs and it stayed in places for DAYS without me having to use ANY hair product like serum(which I don’t use ANYMORE) or pomade or gel.AMAZING!!

2. A great shampoo/conditioner/deep conditioning mask

Now,I used to be clueless over the fact that you have to condition your hair after you have shampooed it.Thus it made my hair very dry.I have also tried so MANY different kinds of shampoo that I swear there’s only like 4 or 5 brand of shampoos out there in Malaysian pharmacies/drug store/ that I haven’t tried yet.My favourite has always been either Pantene,Loreal or Redken.And I was very very sceptical when Clairol Herbal Essences came out with a new line of shampoos that looked very pretty and hip and smells amazing.This is because I’ve had bad experience with past Clairol shampoos and they made my hair very dry.

BUT,after reading the great reviews that it had in US Instyle,TeenVogue and Cosmogirl,I decided to give it a try.And boy how I wish that they had brought the shampoo down sooner to our country.It smoothes and makes my hair incredibly soft and manageable. All I have to do is let it air dry or just blow out my bangs and everything just falls into place.

My fave is Hello Hydration and Long Term Relationship.I use both shampoos/conditioner depending on my mood and they work great on my hair.I also use the split end protector mask twice every week.And,I only wash my hair every 2 days.

3.A great hairdryer/blowdryer

Now this is very important for girls who blow their hair almost everyday like me.Like I said,I’ve been blow drying my hair on my own since I was 12,so yeah,it takes a lot of practice to perfect it but it’s great cos’ I don’t have to go to the salon since I can do a great one on my own. When I don’t have the time I’ll only blow my bangs...but I would die without my hairdryer..haha.

Choose one that is ionic because it dries your hair faster and is far less damaging than regular blowdryer.Buy one with a nozzle(very important!) because it focuses the heat on your hair and smoothes it. I don’t even have to use a straightening iron when I use a nozzle with my blowdryer.Also,try to get one with a cool shot because after you’ve blown your hair,a cool shot makes your hair shiny!

Oh,btw,my hairbrush is like rm 1 something which I bought at Mydin but it works!It’s a paddle brush..hehe.

2/15/2010

Falling slowly..:)


I changed the name of my blog because I saw it somewhere & it made total sense to me because my life,not to mention my wardrobe(though I don't wear a lot of it)is very full of bursting colors!But I've yet to find a blog layout that I love..tried the polkadots & stripes one for awhile but I'm like...nah!Hopefully I'll find a better one soon..Cos' I'm getting sick of this old layout..I need a change people!hahaha.

Oh,btw,my freaking pendrive is acting up-again!!!It means that I've to buy a new one & it's the 4th one that I've bought in the span of 6 months...sigh...Luckily it's only like rm30 a piece...

Last Saturday,had a big family lunch at my grandma's hse.Some of my cousins from Alor Setar came too..I've been catching up on my reading.Just finished 'Does my head look big in this'and it was hilarious!

Now I'm trying to finish reading the newest Cecelia Ahern's book,'The book of tomorrow'.Also I've been hooked on this Korean series,Witch Yoo Hee,thanks to my cousin Fir who stayed over last Saturday.After that,I'm going to watch Cirque Du Freak..woohoo!

I baked some pineapple tarts upon the request by my mum..who can eat a lot of it in one seating..huhu.I hope to try recipes from Cakespy this week..I just love that site!The picture way above,is of the rainbow cake from Dozen Bake Shop that was taken from that site..isn't it so pretty???I would love to bake that cake!

Thanks to my friend Fana who introduced me to the movie Once,I've been hooked on songs by Glen Hansard.Such a beautiful voice!My fave song has got to be Falling Slowly--such a devastatingly beautiful song...:)The lyric is below,along with the video...

Video on Letterman


I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You've made it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now

2/10/2010

Recent things & a bunch of trailers

Actually I had already drafted an entry about why I'm a commitment phobe & yada2 & why I had to decline when someone poured out his feelings towards me recently(btw,I didn't lead him on!)..but then I thought,like a friend of mine said,my blog is not about the heavy stuffs..well sometimes it is,but most of the time,it's about things that I like,what's happening in my life,what I eat,buy and many more.Thus,I think I don't have to explain myself here or go on about how complicated I am when it comes to certain things...Moving on to brighter and better things....


Although life as a practicum teacher can be pretty hectic and tiring,I managed to fit in a few quality time with my family and friends..

There's been impromptu picnic,futsal night,flea marketing,archifest and buying stuffs for my sports team with my students.Below are some of the pics..
*Bought myself 2 pairs of sunnies(god I've so many of em'),a pink tee(with wrong spelling but watevs..got if for cheap since my fren bought 1 too-buying 2 is cheaper than 1) & a uber pretty black sundress..to replace the black skirt of mine tat sum1 ruined&didn't have to courtesy to replace..ehem*









I've to say that I was very envious over Archifest because I really wished that our own faculty could do something akin to that because I know for a fact that there are lots of creative and talented people in our faculty that's just waiting to come out and given an outlet to do so.sigh.

I haven't gone back home in over a month & when I did it was for a day or 2...so imagine my surprise when I cam back I saw there's butterflies on my wall & a new dress inside the wardrobe..weehoo(I forgot to take a pic of the dress)..I think my mum saw THIS on my wall..eheh..yes,the middle of the butterfly isn't finished yet cos' I've no idea what color to use..& I didn't have time to finish it..I MISS MY ROOM & BED--CAN'T WAIT FOR THE HOLS!!
Oh,I haven't done this in awhile but last night I download a bunch of trailers on iTunes & here are a few movies that I'm hoping to watch whether on dvds or the cinema..:)
1.FALLING AWAKE
Looks like it'll be the ghetto version of Romeo & Juliet..The hero is a hunk!




2.LEAP YEAR
I love Amy Adams & Matthew Goode!I've only watched a few of Matthew Goode's film & I adore him.This pairing seems to be perfect..Can't wait to watch it!



3.THE GOOD GUY
Alexis Bledel is GORGEOUS and I am a big fan of her.Add Bryan Greenberg & BOOM!Plus the title is like...what I have been searching all this while..But yeah,we tend to fall for the bad guys because they're exciting but at the end of the day,a good guy is someone you'd want to raise your kids with...I thought the trailer raise very good questions that I HOPE would be answered in the movie..:)

4.THE BACKUP PLAN
Sue me but I love Jennifer Lopez as an actress.haha.Thus I can't wait to see her returning to the big screen in this movie.It looks to be a fun movie!Plus the hero is totally an unexpected actor to be paired up with her.I love the whole bumping into each other thing..hehe.So cute!



5.SHE'S OUT OF MY LEAGUE
'You know what you're problem is Kirk?'...'What?'...'You're a moodle'...LOLSSSSS.I LOVE JAY BARUCHEL.I find him VERY cute..hehehe..Wished there were more scenes of him in Knocked Up and now he is the hero in this one!!yeayyy...Plus,I like the whole modern beauty and the geek/beast thing..So cuteeeeeeee!!




Oh,I've been a bit obssessed with Big Bang(Korea),particularly T.O.P(ommoooo he's so hot!)..blame some of my students...hahaha.Here's a few vids of him with no frills(no eyeliner,bad ass get up)..HE CAN REALLY RAP YO!hahaha

Rapping No Diggity--SHOWS HE CAN SING..but he choose to rap in that rough voice in Big Bang..he should sing more!!!!


HE LOOKS SO CUTE IN SPECTACLES!!


Totally hot!!!!I like the head bopping thing...fuuuuuh!

2/06/2010

It keeps beating

"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream.”--Paulo Coelho

I don't know why but lately I've been gravitating towards Paulo Coelho's quotes.Maybe because most of it touch something in my heart.It's just beautiful and sad and hopeful at the same time.The quote above is very true.A lot of the time we fear more about suffering than suffering itself.
Like a story that a friend told me a few weeks ago...
There are 2 person.One has a perfectly beautiful heart.It's smooth and red and has no bumps or cuts or holes at all.The other one has rips,patches,and holes in it.So who do you think has the most beautiful one?

If you guess the perfectly shaped one,you are wrong.The one with the beautiful heart is not the one who's heart looks perfect.It's the one which has many rips,patches and holes because that heart has gone through a lot in life and survived,making it the most beautiful one compared to the 'perfect' one.It has rips and patches because many have walked in and out of it.It has holes because it has given parts of itself to others.
People come,people go.They'll trample with your heart,play with it,tear it pieces by pieces but it won't kill you.It'll only make you stronger because you know you have the capacity to let people in.The one who's heart is perfect and is not covered in patches probably doesn't know how it feels like to love and hurt.
*Sad statement right?Been there a looong time ago(okay find,a few months ago..eheh)..*

I have to admit that I'm very cautious about certain things and like a friend of mine said,VERY realistic.I'm a realist.I don't have dreams of fairy tales because I know for a fact that it does not exist.Or maybe it hasn't happened to me yet..I don't know...I've never been particularly lucky in 'that' department.I'm not fretting about it because hey,I'm only 22(haven't turned 23 yet okay!).

Though I've to admit,those who expresses their feelings waay before we've even gone out with each other freaks me out..a lot.Sorry..But atleast I have the courtesy to explain why rather than be mum about it.heh.

When I think about it,life is going pretty swell.Only the fact that I'm broke every week or the fact that I've no idea how the heck I'm going to complete my AE and the rare moments when I do feel lonely, brings me down at times.Other than that,I am very thankful for everything.I have a family that provides and cares for me.I have good friends who are there for me when I need them--you know who u r..:)..I have students who are cooperative and have many cute and sometimes annoying antics.I'm definitely going to miss them because they never fail to make me laugh and make me feel young everyday.hahaha.

But there are things that shocked me about students in my school, like girls who are only 14 years old but have slept with their boyfriend.Like what is up with that?You're too young to even know what sex is.I'm proud that I'm still a virgin and insyallah I'll stay that way until I find the right guy to be my husband.:)But that will be like light years away..

There's so many things that I want to achieve in life.SO many things that I'm puzzled what I should do once I graduate.But it's okay,I have many months left before I have to decide on that..Got to catch my beauty sleep..Glad that I'm sleeping at my friends house as I haven't done that in awhile..miss them a whole bunch!

2/03/2010

Sad things that I saw with my eyes

*Been AWOL from blogging for a week because both of my mentor(about to deliver her baby so had to speed things up) and supervisor(just got pregnant & isn't feeling well so have to speed it up too) have been observing me for 4 days straight since Thursday*

2 things that I saw last week that made my heart sank and made me to remind myself to appreciate what I have and not complain much and just to be thankful for the fact that I have a roof over my head,enough food and love and such.

No 1:Last Saturday,my mum and my siblings were waiting in the car for my dad to withdraw his money.Suddenly my mum pointed out to a decently dressed woman who was rooting in the trash bin, collecting empty bottles and cans.Her friend was going through the contents of another trash bin,not far away from it.They were collecting trash to turn into money maybe to feed themselves or their children.Who knows..

But it made me sad because it was in the city and she wasn't shabbily dressed either.If we walked pass her in a mall or by the street we might think that her life is okay.But what's on the outside doesn't necessarily reflects what it is on the inside.

Watching her and her friend that day humbles me, because I tend to complain about trivial things to my parents.Things that are minuscule compared to the problems of others in the world.

No 2:I was driving back to Shah Alam from my parent's place one evening and it was raining heavily.A few minutes later,I saw a man walking by the roadside and he was soaked and he carried a bag and it looked like he didn't have much to live by with.It was just really heart wrenching because it was raining cats and dogs and here was a man who just had to push through and walk miles to go home.

When I said miles it's because the road was in the middle of nowhere and was surrounded with vegetation and the nearest housing area(where my family lives) was miles away.

All these things made me realize how small my 'problems' are compared to others who are trying to merely get by or survive from day to day. Their situation reminded me of this quote--'He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. '--Friedrich Nietzsche